I'm running back and forth between the two houses, and my dads not home.. whenever I come to this house I log on.. so I thought I'd try to update really fast... I have the AC off so I can hear if my dad comes, and I keep running to the window :/.. the heat is crazy today.. anyways

 

we are moving to a house down the street, closer to khala aisha.. and im aight with that.. inshaAllah its for the better, and I really could care less.. just alot of work..

 

The other day my dad saw me online and he got REALlY mad.. even though I was just on my class.. starts going off about how I'm "back to my old ways" and stuff.. then he pretty much disowned me.. wallah im not kidding.. said he doesnt want to know me,  hes just going to live like I'm not there.. So since then I've been up in my room, avoiding him.. and ya things are pretty bad.. ofcourse he changed password on computer and gave out his all to famous "cant leave the house" punishment.

 

It hurts so much this time couse he knows that I did nothing.. as does everyone else.. hes just using me to get to my mom couse he knows thats what hurts her the most.. hes also using this as a distraction so we wont figure out whatever hes up to.. alhamdulilah 'ala kulli haal..

 

its almost as if he wants to push me to my limmit.. get me to do something stupid.. couse he was like "I'm not going to put a lock on the door, whoever wants to leave is more than welcome to, just dont think of coming back".. yea, whatever.. lol, he dont know that I almost tried to do something more stupid before.. but I've come to realize doing something like that wont make things better for anyone, only worse. May Allah swt guide us all..aameen..

 

Just keep me in your duaa.. inshaAllah I'll be able to come online sometimes when he is at work.. and inshaAllah things will get better like they did before. Although this time is probably one of the worse times.. even before all the drama happened yesterday things were pretty bad.. alhamdulilah 'ala kulli haal..

 

I've always been able to stay patient alhamdulilah.. but for the first time I dont feel able to forgive, and my sabr is getting less.. so just make duaa I keep my cool and dont make things worse..

anyways I better get off before he ends up coming home or something... I know this update sucks and probably dont make sense.. I'll try to write another one some other time and make things a bit more clear.. inshaAllah.